Week to get my mind right

The exhaustion really hit me hard on Sunday as I fell asleep while feeding Colin during his 7am feeding. Sophia could see that I was struggling and let me go back to sleep. She’s been amazing through the last few weeks and has been a supermom while I’ve been trying to keep it together.

The built up exhaustion from the last 5 months of being a father combined with the stress of work has been really hard. Add in a cross country move in a month and you’ve got a perfect storm. My anxiety levels have been possibly at an all-time high and it’s definitely made things worse. I had a horrible night of sleep last night as my mind spiraled.

I had decided to take the rest of this week off once the quarter ended about a couple weeks ago. I could sense that I was going to need some time away to recover, and I knew the sprint to close out the quarter wouldn’t be easy. Unfortunately, I didn’t think things would get this bad.

Needless to say, this time off couldn’t come earlier. My main thing that I want to accomplish is to rest and get my mind right. As such, I don’t have many major plans for the week and we kept the nanny to allow me time to focus on myself for a bit.

After some morning calls tomorrow, I think I just want to simply do nothing the rest of the day. I may sit in bed and stream Netflix all day. A day for me to do absolutely nothing sounds fantastic and something I haven’t had in a very long time. I hope the rest of the week will be similar mixed in with some time outdoors, some time reading, and some hanging out with Sophia and Colin.

I want to do my best to just tune everything out when it comes to work. I’ve never been good at unplugging even while on vacation or during my “paternity leave”. But this time it just feels a lot different. It’s time that I get away from my inbox and work for a few days and focus on making sure I come back energized. That’s the best thing for myself and Secfi. Prolonging my burnout isn’t going to do anyone any good.